Sunday, December 14
(Seem)
blink once, twice
withering under scarlet nights
look left, right
savoring a crimson delight
step once, twice
a dance of fatality in gentle nights
flutter left, right
a glorious secret in the moonlight
cheat once, twice
saccharine blood never felt so right
dance left, right
i'll kiss your lips beneath satin starlight
touch me once, twice
falsehood is my paradise
push me left, right
you fill me with risqué delight
spoil me once, twice
let me dance on the edge of the knife
sway me left, right
mourning in the candlelight
=========================================
gah. I'm feeling numb and confused and at war with myself, and I don't want to think, I just want to curl up in a ball and sleep forever and ever. I don't want to think about this up comming week and what I'm going to do over the weekend, and I don't want to think about christmas and about what how and who I'm gonna get presents for my loved ones and how my mom lost her job the other day yet we go out and spend spend spend more money money money and how it's all just crappy.
why is cragun not im-ing me back?
why do relationships have to be so complicated?
why don't I hardly ever do things with friends?
why do I feel not wanted?
why do I give and give and listen and listen and feel like I'm not getting much in return, yet feel like I'm not giving much in return to those who give and give and listen and listen to me?
why am I so afraid of being raped by any random guy that just walks around the corner or passes me on the street? yet I joke about it? yet I try not to?
why is it hard to stop swearing when most of my friends do often, or better yet, why is it even part of our culture, to swear a lot and such.
why am I afraid to make new friends, yet I know that I probably should?
I could probably think of a dozen more whys but I'll keep them inside for now just for the sake of space and time.
-_-
blink once, twice
withering under scarlet nights
look left, right
savoring a crimson delight
step once, twice
a dance of fatality in gentle nights
flutter left, right
a glorious secret in the moonlight
cheat once, twice
saccharine blood never felt so right
dance left, right
i'll kiss your lips beneath satin starlight
touch me once, twice
falsehood is my paradise
push me left, right
you fill me with risqué delight
spoil me once, twice
let me dance on the edge of the knife
sway me left, right
mourning in the candlelight
=========================================
gah. I'm feeling numb and confused and at war with myself, and I don't want to think, I just want to curl up in a ball and sleep forever and ever. I don't want to think about this up comming week and what I'm going to do over the weekend, and I don't want to think about christmas and about what how and who I'm gonna get presents for my loved ones and how my mom lost her job the other day yet we go out and spend spend spend more money money money and how it's all just crappy.
why is cragun not im-ing me back?
why do relationships have to be so complicated?
why don't I hardly ever do things with friends?
why do I feel not wanted?
why do I give and give and listen and listen and feel like I'm not getting much in return, yet feel like I'm not giving much in return to those who give and give and listen and listen to me?
why am I so afraid of being raped by any random guy that just walks around the corner or passes me on the street? yet I joke about it? yet I try not to?
why is it hard to stop swearing when most of my friends do often, or better yet, why is it even part of our culture, to swear a lot and such.
why am I afraid to make new friends, yet I know that I probably should?
I could probably think of a dozen more whys but I'll keep them inside for now just for the sake of space and time.
-_-
# posted by Alyssa : 8:18 PM
